Tale of a MiddleSchooler:The Old Me Is Dead & Gone
by i8thecake
Summary: This is the tale of a middle school girl growing up . Yet the school that she changed to has changed HER, made her antisocial – why? How? Read to find out! INTRO INCLUDED Intro may give better description . Hints of/actual SoraxKairi
1. Intro

Description: This is the tale of a middle school girl (growing up). Yet the school that she changed to has changed HER, made her antisocial – why? How? Read to find out! INTRO INCLUDED (Intro may give better description). Hints of/actual SoraxKairi

**New story! (I was sick of the lovey-dovey theme lol) :)**

**Alright this one is from Kairi's POV, and it shows her going through her middle school years (grade 5-8).**

**I'm thinking of doing one year per chapter (plus an intro and maybe an epilogue), so there would be about five or six chapters.**

**Please R&R and tell me whether I should continue!**

* * *

Intro

_Oh,  
__I've been traveling on this road too long (too long).  
__Just trying to find my way back home (back home).  
__The old me is dead and gone,  
__Dead and gone._

_Oh,  
__I've been traveling on this road too long (too long).  
__Just trying to find my way back home (back home).  
__The old me is dead and gone,  
__Dead and gone._

_I turn my head to the east,  
__I don't see nobody by my side.  
__I turn my head to the west,  
__Still nobody in sight.  
__So I turn my head to the north,  
__Swallow that pill that they call pride;  
__The old me is dead and gone, but that new me will be alright._

_I turn my head to the east,  
__I don't see nobody by my side.  
__I turn my head to the west,  
__Still nobody in sight.  
__So I turn my head to the north,  
__Swallow that pill that they call pride;  
__The old me is dead and gone, but that new me will be alright._

I remember my old school when I was younger, East Commons. I was friends with a girl and a boy, who I vaguely remember.

_Selphie called, "Going to the playground?"_

_I nodded._

"_Coming too," said the boy. He had spiky blonde hair and ocean blue eyes._

I pried my eyes open. That boy didn't have blonde hair anymore, it turned brown; that boy was Sora. Selphie, Sora, and I were _inseparable_, we were all like siblings.

I have these vague memories – pictures instilled in my head, more like – of when I was at East Commons. Not all of them are full flashbacks, sometimes they're just a quick flash of a memory I had.

For some reason, one of those pictures includes Selphie, Sora, and I standing next to each other getting a picture taken. Sora and I were hugging and simultaneously Selphie and I were hugging.

But then in kindergarten, I switched schools to West Square School – which I _hate_. It's so clique-y, there's this hierarchy and this weird feeling… a cold one that suggests that the people there only want you for your brains and not for who you really are.

Then a year or two later Selphie came to my school, and a few years after that Sora came. I remember when Sora came, it was the first time I saw him since East Commons. I didn't know he was going to come, and he looked so different! Yet as soon as my eyes landed on him, the current him and the little boy version of him kept on flashing back and forth in my head, between his old self with blonde hair and him now with brown spiky hair.

But because of that school, I've become antisocial. Though it may not seem so on the outside, it is so on the inside. Not that sometimes I don't actually want to socialize, not that I'm not good at finding subjects to strike up a conversation, not that I just wonder why sometimes…

But…

__

Why?!

( Okay, basically I lied; )  
Sometimes I actually don't want to be social,  
Sometimes I can't find a good topic to start up a conversation,  
And sometimes… I wonder.  
Sometimes, I reflect on the past…

What would've happened if I stayed at East Commons? Would I still be antisocial?

My parents always tell my how good it was that I switched schools because East Commons has really bad academics as the grades get older, but the one thing I liked about it is that it seemed like a good, nurturing school, unlike my current school.

Selphie says she doesn't mind the hierarchy here. Sora says he doesn't really pay attention to it (_boys!), _so there's really no one I can turn to. It sometimes makes me feel better when Selphie and Sora tell me good stories of their lives back in East Commons. But – even though I don't want to sound self-absorbed (especially since I'm not) – this isn't about them. This is about me.

So here's my story;

Are _you_ ready?


	2. Our Lives

**This starts out in Kairi's fifth grade, when she is still her true self (before she changes because the way her school is affects her)**

**Enjoy! **

**Reviews are ****always**** appreciated!**

* * *

Our Lives

My eyes shot open. I looked at my window and saw the sun shining through.

I sat up with a big smile on my face and sighed. _'Today's going to be amazing_,' I thought – oh, naive me.

I jumped out of bed and rushed to go get some breakfast. Pop tarts? French toast? Cocoa Pebbles? Cake! I grabbed a slice of my favorite chocolate cake and a glass of milk. Taking a seat by the window, I looked outside.

It was very picturesque; the sea was shining, the palm trees were ever so slightly blowing in the wind, the clouds looked extra fluffy that day, the sky was a deep, deep blue, and then there was Sora and Riku. Of course, they were play fighting with their swords – might I add that they're _wooden _swords?

I laughed out loud at this thought. Imagine Sora and Riku fighting with real swords! That'd be a sight. But I wouldn't want that to happen – what if one of them got hurt?

I put the dishes in the sink and ran water over them. I turned left and went into "my" room. …Why the quotations? My parents decided that they wanted to renovate our old apartment, so we have to rent this one, the one I'm in right now, for some time.

But it was amazing! I got this big-ish room. I opened the door, and about three feet later on the left there was a door to a bathroom (that was actually _inside _my room!) and then I continued for a few more feet in the little hallway into my room. The first thing that caught my eye when I entered is the blinding light from outside. I had olive green curtain shades, but the only time I used them is when I slept or when I got changed. Next, I have a closet, a desktop computer, and my sister's old temperpeudic bed that I used because she was in college. My bed was pushed against the leftmost wall with the pillow facing one of the two windows in my room. One of the windows was right in front of my bed, and the other was a few feet to the right of it, near the desk with my computer on it.

Outside of my room, there was the living room and dining room, another bathroom, and my parents' room. The living room and dining room were basically one room, and instead of a couch we had my old bed, since I took my older sister's temperpuedic. And when I would enter the apartment, the door was in between the kitchen and the living and dining room.

So I went into my room and changed into olive cargo pants, and a loose blue, green, and yellow tie-dye shirt. I looked in the mirror and gasped – what's happening to me?

The only thing is, I knew _exactly _what was going on. I just couldn't see it.

'_I'm too young,'_ I thought. _'A fifth grader? A ten year old? Already?' _

But the evidence was … evidential. I started growing, in the place all girls eventually grow.

I ignored that fact as I pushed past my door and left a note on the counter in case my parents were wondering where I went.

I stepped outside the apartment building and walked to the beach where Sora and Riku were "fighting."

"Hey guys!" I called.

I didn't get a response. "Guys! Hey guys!"

Still no response. "It's so nice to see that you acknowledge my existence," I said sarcastically.

I waited a few minutes until their battle was over, and tried again. "HELLO?! Sora, Riku!"

They turned around, bumping each other on the head in the process. I face palmed myself, thinking _'Could they be any more—?'_

"Kairi!" Sora said, interrupting my thought. "When did you show up?"

I rolled my eyes. "Like a few minutes ago."

"Oh, sorry."

"So," said Riku, "what's going on?" _'Hah,_' I thought, _'that's exactly what I thought earlier today, this morning, when I looked in the mirror…'_

I held back a laugh from my thoughts and shrugged. "It's a nice day. I think we should do something."

"Oh yeah?" He raised an eyebrow. "Like what?"

"Like… go to the park, swim, I don't know!"

"I vote park!" said Sora.

Riku and I exchanged glances. I could tell Riku wanted a swim, but I myself wanted to go to the park. Plus, I don't know… wouldn't it be a little weird? Awkward? Especially with my… "evidence"?

Then again… If it was Sora and me swimming…. '_Ew!'_ I stopped thinking right there.

"Sorry Riku, you're outnumbered," I said at last.

"Fine, park it is," he mumbled.

Though I thought the day was beautiful enough, I was proven wrong. While we were in the park, there was this meadow we went to.

It was like a dream! Only… better than a dream; it was _real_. The meadow was a big, open space. The grass was a bright green that met with the sky at a point that seemed like forever. Though the flowers only started to bloom, it was already summer in my mind.

Sora, Riku, and I lay down on the grass (in the shade, under a paupou tree) next to each other. I closed my eyes.

"Fifth grade's almost over," I began.

"Yeah," said Riku, "and we're going into sixth next year."

"You guys… realize it's never going to be like this again?" Sora asked. "We're going to have so much more school work, we get let out of school later, and classes get harder."

"Isn't it always like that though?" I said. "With each year as we grow, the next grade we go into is always going to be a challenge. Fifth grade was a challenge at first, remember? Finding our way around the middle school?" I paused. "It's true though… I feel like this is our last school year as actual kids…"

Riku snorted. "'Actual kids'?! What are you, a grown up?"

"Whatever happens," Sora said, ignoring Riku's remark, "just so long as we have each other…"

"…everything should be just fine," finished Riku sincerely and nodded.

After a while of silence, I opened my eyes and looked up at the sky. "Doesn't that cloud look like our English teacher, Ms. Chase?"

We all laughed. Ms. Chase was a stout woman; let's just put it that way.

I sighed and plopped my head on my hand, looking at Sora and Riku who were looking back at me.

It was right then and there that I realized one thing; life wasn't going to be like this _ever_ again.

_We can't go on  
Thinking it's wrong to speak our minds.  
I've got to let out what's inside... _

_Is there love, tonight,  
When everyone's dreaming –  
Well can we get it right?  
Yeah, well can we get it right?_

_Cause these are the days worth living,  
These are the years we're given.  
And these are the moments,  
These are the times,  
Let's make the best out of our lives..._

_And even if hope was shattered,  
I know it wouldn't matter.  
Cause these are the moments,  
These are the times,  
Let's make the best out of our lives..._

_Oh, yeah, let's make the best out of our lives..._

**(A/n: the song was Our Lives by the Calling)**

* * *

Everyday after I was dismissed from West Square Middle, my mom would come and pick me up and we would cross the park to walk home together. I was always amused and entranced by all the sights in the park; the trees, the rocks, the grass, playgrounds, and so on.

Walking through the park gave me a sense of … clarity, serenity. There, time stood still; like for one whole second, my life slowed down and gave me time to catch up. For one whole second I could relax and breathe. For one whole second, I could be in total and complete bliss.

We passed by one of the playground areas, and I decided I wanted to go on the swings, which worked out well because I didn't have homework that night. My mom agreed, but reluctantly.

"We're not going to stay for too long, though," she said.

"Aw, c'mon, you can swing too."

So we were swinging on the swings in the park, feeling the breeze blowing on our faces, not a care in the world…

Careless and carefree, that's how life was.

"Alright, let's go," my mom said, interrupting my thoughts.

I didn't argue, I just took my backpack and pushed my legs forward, hoping to find that sense of everlasting bliss.

* * *

A typical day at school was this: classes, friends, classes, friends, friends, classes…

Sora's locker was next to mine. "Hey, Kairi," he'd say every time I'd walk by him.

He'd always flash me a smile and – if I'm not mistaken? – blush. I'd smile back and poke him playfully. "Hey, there, Sora," I'd say.

We'd swap stories of events that happened to us during the day – whether it was a teacher picking on us, a kid picking on us, what we got on the last math test, or what rumors where going around about Selphie and Riku and warning them about it.

I was a pretty good student; I worked very hard, though I didn't need too, I studied for tests and got a lot of 100s, and I paid attention in class.

Though, during a typical class, when and _if _I would daydream, sometimes I'd just subconsciously go on random rants in my mind. One time it got to a point where I thought…

'_What is all we ever want it life? What is all _I _ever want in life? Well… let's see: a good outlook on life, good friends, good grades in school, and… a guy I like._

_I smiled to myself in spite of that. 'Well, it seems that I've got all I ever want right now.'_

I thought I had all I ever wanted. Everything in my life then was picture perfect – and you can imagine who that brown spiky haired guy was.

Back then nothing could bring me down, nothing could go wrong; I wouldn't let it.

* * *

I remember this fateful day very clearly. It was the day before my eleventh birthday, and I woke up at 7:58 in the morning. I went to the bathroom, but when I flushed the toilet, I didn't see what I had expected – I saw red.

I screamed a little, and then went into the living room. "Mom… I have to talk to you…" I said.

"I'll be there in a second, sweetie," she said.

She came into my room and saw me standing outside the bathroom door. Not a word was said, but I held up red tissue paper.

She immediately enveloped me in a hug and I started crying. "I'm too young to die," I muttered into her shoulder.

She chuckled a little. "It's okay, it's okay…."

I changed clothes and my mom and I went shopping, if you catch my drift.

So I got my period when I was ten years and 364 days old…. Great.

When I went to school the next day, and I still had my "red pen", I could've sworn it's like everyone knew. They all came up to me asking questions like "Are you okay?" "What happened?" "Why do you look so annoyed?"

Selphie knows, I told her. She freaked and hugged me, but I could tell she felt bad.

At lunch, Sora, Riku, and Selphie came out of the lunch room with a brownie with chips surrounding it and a carrot sticking out of it (supposedly a candle). They started singing "happy birthday to you", and pretty soon the whole lunch room was singing it.

I smiled happily and ate my "birthday cake." I loved my life at the time, and the people in it.

It's too bad so much had to change since then.

* * *

When I was in fifth grade, I saw everything differently – that is, with a lighter perspective. I noticed all the amazing, tiny details that _made_ life what it was then, but now I wouldn't recognize them _for_ my life. Then, I didn't notice all the dark details I do now. Why?

Because that damn school had to be so … damned! And the worst part is, no matter how hard I try, I'll never be like I was before; scars may heal, but they never go away.

But, some people say, scars aren't meant to go away – they're supposed to stay so that you'll always be reminded of your past so you can learn from it.  
Know what I say? SCREW THAT! Why would you want to be hurt when you could be careless and carefree? A wise man once told me that wise men are always burdened by wisdom! So why be burdened?

People make no sense.


End file.
